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masturbatress:

"Outside, another cock randomly goes off. Inside, I’m dead."

masturbatress:

"Outside, another cock randomly goes off. Inside, I’m dead."

Tags: penis
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msbehavoyeur:

nightmare ~ Gerard Dubois

msbehavoyeur:

nightmare ~ Gerard Dubois

(via masturbatress)

Tags: penis
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reigning-darkness:

Metal albums with googly eyes
This never gets old, omfg

(via kingunderthemountain)

Tags: uguu
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owlmylove:

whenever i’m sad i like to imagine what possible crime Steve Irwin’s ancestor committed to warrant him being sent to Australia like some Victorian gentleman escorting a lady to the zoo past the crocodile enclosure and going “do you see that great wyrm sunning itself there? quite a striking creature, is it not? I do believe I shall engage it in fisticuffs.” 

(via kingunderthemountain)

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dat-soldier:

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We said ‘casual tea’ over the radio but yeah I can see how it might be confusing

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haulocoelho:


No one can discover you until you do. Hollow. Empty.

haulocoelho:

No one can discover you until you do. Hollow. Empty.

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"Are you the SAT because I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a 10 minute break halfway through for snacks, and then I can stare at you for like 10 minutes and think ‘wow, I hope I don’t ruin this.’"

— Dude on OKC with the best pick up lines I have ever heard (via katamarang)

(via defeeler)

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carypm:

dragqueenmerlin:

Just received my size 50 knitting needles in the mail, and I’m pretty sure these are weapons, not craft making tools

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The cat’s face

(via kingunderthemountain)

Tags: katte
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